Becoming

Woman/Garden/Physics

It all started when we moved.

This white farmhouse with its unmarked property, sunrises and sunsets over open fields lined with century trees, scope for imagination and creativity and development.

It was here I finally started to understand my ADHD and Autism, and tried to come to terms with my Fibro, M.E./C.F.S. and  P.O.T.S.

If I can’t do ___ what can I do instead? When my body rebels, what positive, nurturing activity can I enjoy?

Josh bought me an easel. I started to accumulate tubes and pans of paint and canvas stretched or not; paper and palettes and tools, oh my!

With new medication I had the energy and continuance to read again and found my love for mathematics after hating it all my life, and my love for physics. 

These thoughts combined with my continued interest in stewardship of the land, connecting niche species and required habitats with the needs and accommodations required by neurodivergence. Specialists occur at the apex of an ecosystem and are only sustained by its continuance. Loss of habitat and psychological bombardment can easily lead to loss of these unique creatures. I knew how they felt. 

So I built my hibernaculum and started a process of recovery. Hyperfocus, deep diving, connections galore and a creative outlet to try to express the thoughts inside my head. 

Here is the beginning.

BJ